Let’s be honest, no one wakes up hoping to be known as the person holding the team back. But far too often, professionals accidentally sabotage their reputation (and potential) with just a few poorly chosen words.
In my years coaching professionals through Successfully Ever After™ and working with leaders across industries, I’ve seen careers take off, and stall, based on what people say in the moments that matter most.
If you want to stand out as a rising star in your organization — someone your boss can’t imagine the team without — there are five phrases you should delete from your vocabulary right now.
(And if you’re serious about building your personal brand at work, you’ll find a deeper dive into these concepts in my book Get Noticed, Get Hired and the culture side of this conversation in Culture Secrets — both available wherever you buy books.)
1. “That’s not my job.”
This one’s a classic and it’s a career killer.
Saying “that’s not my job” tells your supervisor you’re focused on your job description, not your impact. And here’s the thing: rising stars don’t just fill a role — they create value.
In Culture Secrets, I talk about how thriving workplace cultures are built on accountability and engagement. When you step up and help solve problems (even the ones technically outside your lane), you demonstrate that same ownership mindset leaders crave.
Does that mean saying yes to everything? No. But it means being solutions-oriented:
Try saying, “I haven’t handled that before, but I can look into it and see what I can do,” or “I can take the first step and loop in the right person.”
Those are the kind of statements that build trust — and visibility.
2. “That’s how we’ve always done it.”
Few sentences make a supervisor’s stomach drop faster.
This phrase signals resistance to change, and in a world that evolves faster than your iPhone updates, adaptability is everything.
One of the key messages in Get Noticed, Get Hired is that career success belongs to those who stay curious. Whether you’re looking for your next promotion or your next big opportunity, curiosity is your competitive edge.
When your boss suggests a new system, approach, or tool, lean in. Ask questions. Offer to pilot the change. Even if it fails, you’ll be seen as someone who embraces innovation rather than clings to the comfort zone.
In my coaching work, I tell clients: You can’t stand out if you blend in with the status quo. The moment you start thinking like a problem solver instead of a rule follower, you move from replaceable to remarkable.
3. “I didn’t know.”
Let’s reframe that: It’s your job to know.
Leaders understand that sometimes information gets missed; but when “I didn’t know” becomes a pattern, it reads as disengagement or lack of initiative.
In a healthy workplace culture, communication is a two-way street. You don’t have to wait to be told what’s going on, you can seek it out. Read the memos. Ask questions at meetings. Follow up after project updates. Stay in the know so you can anticipate what’s coming next.
In Culture Secrets, I share how high-performing teams build ownership loops where everyone takes responsibility for staying informed and aligned. Rising stars don’t just react; they anticipate. They see what’s ahead and prepare for it.
So the next time you’re tempted to say “I didn’t know,” swap it for “I checked into that, and here’s what I found.” That small shift shows awareness and leadership potential.
4. “That’s not fair.”
It’s human to want fairness, but here’s a truth every successful professional learns early: Workplaces aren’t perfectly fair, but they are full of opportunities.
Complaining about fairness signals frustration without offering solutions. Rising stars use that energy differently. They advocate, influence, and elevate.
When I coach clients who feel overlooked for promotions or projects, we dig into what they can control — their visibility, their relationships, and the value they bring to the table.
If something feels unbalanced, focus on communication instead of complaint:
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“I’d love to talk about how I can prepare for that opportunity next time.”
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“Can we review my progress so I can understand where to improve?”
These phrases shift you from victim to visionary; someone focused on growth, not grievances.
5. “That’s not possible.”
When a leader hears that, what they really hear is, “I’ve already stopped trying.”
Rising stars are resourceful. They may not always know how to make something happen, but they’re willing to explore options.
Try this instead:
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“That might be challenging, but let’s look at what would make it possible.”
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“It’s tight, but if we adjust ___, we might get there.”
One of my favorite chapters in Get Noticed, Get Hired is about cultivating an “opportunity mindset.” That mindset is what separates professionals who advance from those who plateau.
Even when a task feels impossible, your willingness to stay solution-focused demonstrates leadership readiness, and that’s something every supervisor notices.
Bonus Thought: The Words You Should Use
Want to replace those career-limiting phrases with language that accelerates your growth? Start using statements like:
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“I’ll take ownership of that.”
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“I’d like to learn how to do that.”
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“Here’s what I’ve tried so far.”
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“Let’s explore a better way.”
These aren’t just words … they’re signals. They say, “I’m invested. I’m growing. I’m leadership material.”
The Big Picture
Becoming a rising star in your organization isn’t about being perfect — it’s about being intentional. The way you communicate shapes how others see your value, reliability, and potential.
That’s why I’ve built my career, and my books, around helping professionals master the skills that get them noticed for all the right reasons.
If you’re ready to take control of your professional story, here’s your next step:
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Grab your copy of Get Noticed, Get Hired for practical tools to build your personal brand and career momentum.
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Dive into Culture Secrets to understand how thriving workplace cultures elevate everyone’s performance — and how you can be the kind of employee every leader wants on their team.
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And if you prefer quick, actionable tips, visit my Successfully Ever After YouTube Channel where I share clips and coaching moments straight from the book.
Your future self will thank you for deleting those five phrases — and replacing them with the mindset of a leader.
